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Amber Rose

Amber Rose & The Curious Case Of Protecting Your Panty Pudding

Amber Rose

If you haven’t heard much from the them as of late, it’s mainly because they’re too busy crying a skankbucket of tears, wiping their asses back to front, and begging the mainstream press to give them a bit more head(lines), because?

Their empire is crumbling quicker than you can say…

“Which corner?!

Which alley?!”

Verbal SLAPS predicted this WAY back in the day and now that it has come into fruition, we can say with unabashed glee…

B*tches, we told ya!

According to our theory, Blac Chyna and Amber Rose were absolutely sick of boring, non-talented, OFF-white trixxx heavily borrowing their EVERYTHING to get a check, and so they devised a plan that is now paying off in ways most never could have foreseen.

First, Blac Chyna assASSinates the lone male heir in that klan and is set to pop out an heir as her reality show secures stellar ratings. Next, Amber Rose has secured more projects and tours that will see her profile rise and rise and rise through 2017 and beyond. Clearly, the general public has slowly but surely begun to see through the smoke and mirrors and are now demanding the M-E-A-T! And guess what, Heauxz?

Their plates runneth over!

Amber Rose
Muva & Chyna: because America has had ENOUGH of pretenders!

As that male lone heir from that klan cries and wonders how he fell into the Honeywell trap, and as the youngest THOT from that klan wonders how much debt of her pimp she will have to pay off, only Amber is getting away with no shots to her dome and this recent news is enough to make Kanye’s THOT scream with madness.

It has just been announced that in addition to her emoji app, talk show, stint on ‘Dancing With The Stars’, SlutWalk, podcast, and cosmetics line (have several seats, Kylie!), Amber is set to go on a nationwide tour that will net her in excess of $8 million dollars.

Amber Rose

#AmberRoseLiveTour is going to be all that and a bag of spicy ass chips as she Muva takes her wares from Los Angeles to Miami and every major city in between. With Tori Brixx as her opening act and a few surprises along the way, we predict by the end of 2017, the world will actually see that klan begging E! to keep them on the air out of desperation.

So as we say at Verbal SLAPS?

The proof is in the panty pudding!

Triston is an American jetset performance artist, writer, event organizer, and activist based in Europe. As a freelance journalist, he has covered both the underground and mainstream aspects of the arts, culture, music, entertainment, travel, fashion and Fashion Week in several cities, including New York, London, Berlin, Istanbul, Sydney, Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Tokyo to name a few. He has been published in The Huffington Post, Trespass (London), Adaras Magazine (Miami) as well as featured in publications such as the New York Times, Vogue Italia, Washington Post, Turkish Huriyet and other on-line and print magazines in the U.S. and internationally. He recently released his memoir on life in Europe, 'Heaux Confessionals'. As a solo performer and with his band $kandal Du$t, he has toured in some of the world's most renowned clubs, simultaneously maintaining an underground renaissance, blurring the lines of all that is traditional and leaving his indelible, and ultimately unforgettable impression. There is no divide.

Brace yourself.


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