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What happens when you gather the ingredients of hoodrat, skankery, barebacking, same-sex lovin’, and then throw them into a cauldron full of dirty water, with a dash of nepotism and tiger blood?

 

No, we’re not talking about Miley Cyrus!

 

(at least not this time)

 

Charlie Sheen!

 

The actor, who is yet again making headline news for things other than his body of work, probably thought his name would subside from the headlines once he made his HIV status public.

 

How utterly wrong he was.

 

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Unfresh on the heels of that admission comes news from some very reliable sources that The Sheen Peen has been in and out of a bevy of porn stars, but also has had at least some part-time kinky duty with men as well.

 

According to sources, there is a tape floating around that shows the alleged ladies man engaging in oral sex with a man. But of course, that is not the only thing Sheen is doing on that tape. This being Charlie Sheen, he’s also smoking a bit of crack too. Because everyone should apparently smoke crack before they smoke peen, right?

 

There’s more!

 

And just before we were about to advise to lick crack and not smoke it?

 

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There seems be footage of Sheen going all the way with his male co-star, and unprotected, even, although there have been reports that Sheen may have a side case of herpes as well.

 

But when you have money, you can make a lot of things go away. Not herpes, of course, as that is the gift that keeps on giving. But Sheen was able to buy silence via hush money. The problem?

 

One bootleg reared its ugly head!

 

For a man that spent almost $2 million on hookers and hoodrattery in 2013 alone, surely he could have kicked in a few more coins to have ALL evidence destroyed?

 

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these jokes are just writing themselves…

As it turns out, that money went to not only hookers, but also a few male gigolos as well. According to one source?

 

“Charlie is secretly bisexual.”

 

As if this is a secret?!

 

Well, the cat is not only out of the bag, but it has been skinned alive, and set on fire!

 

According to another source, Sheen’s ex-wife Brooke Mueller and he also engaged in sex with multiple partners when they were married. And everyone knows how those two love the white powders. Who knows how many grams of coke they snorted off of various asses during their marriage?!

 

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The tape dates back to 2011, when Sheen alleges he became aware of his status, and if reports are to be believed, the tape led to a lawsuit that was settled out of court for millions and now Sheen claims he is not going to shell out any more bucks to any one else that comes forward.

 

We’ll see about that, Charlie!

 

Stay tuned…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Triston
Triston is an American jetset performance artist, writer, event organizer, and activist based in Europe. As a freelance journalist, he has covered both the underground and mainstream aspects of the arts, culture, music, entertainment, travel, fashion and Fashion Week in several cities, including New York, London, Berlin, Istanbul, Sydney, Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Tokyo to name a few. He has been published in The Huffington Post, Trespass (London), Adaras Magazine (Miami) as well as featured in publications such as the New York Times, Vogue Italia, Turkish Huriyet and other on-line and print magazines in the U.S. and internationally. He recently released his memoir on life in Europe, 'Heaux Confessionals'. As a solo performer and with his band $kandal Du$t, he has toured in some of the world's most renowned clubs, simultaneously maintaining an underground renaissance, blurring the lines of all that is traditional and leaving his indelible, and ultimately unforgettable impression. There is no divide.

Brace yourself.


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