Dolly Parton

Let us be clear:

If you are not a fan of Dolly Parton, you can just leave right now! Right this very instant because we will not have it! Respect the icons and be glad they’re still a few left on this earth. As Dolly makes a return to touring after a long hiatus, the living legend threw out a few quips that are all the more to love her. At 70 years young, she shows no signs of slowing down and this is a very good thing indeed. On her new tour, Parton says…

“I’m having such a good time and the fans seem to be enjoying me,” she continued. “So I’m going to ride that wave until I get washed ashore.”

On her looks? Dolly was raised right and knows that a superstar should look the party EVERY minute of the day…

“I’d feel like a fool if I went incognito somewhere and I looked awful and they recognized me anyhow. I’d rather they just say, ‘Oh, I saw Dolly Parton today,’ than just say, ‘Lord, did you see Dolly Parton? She looked like hell.’ That would be the worse thing for someone like me – a big painted-up plastic doll.”

Dolly Parton

And at this point, Parton has mastered the art of beauty and can get into her signature look as quickly as Wonder Woman can twirl around…

“It takes a lot of money to look this cheap. I’ve timed it and I can be completely good and ready in 20 minutes,” she dished. “But I like to have an hour if I can. I don’t count them, but I say I must have at least 365 wigs because I usually wear a different one every day. But if I’m just at home, I don’t wear wigs. I keep my own hair and I keep my roots done – my own hair is the same blond color as the wigs.”

But underneath all that plastic surgery, Dolly Parton has more talent in one breast than most poptrixxx combined. So for today’s alleged top-tier talent, remember that true talent will take you further than any Botox, Instagram account, or tabloid ever will.

Take notes, _____, ______, and _____.

Dolly Parton is still in the building.

Triston
Triston is an American jetset performance artist, writer, event organizer, and activist based in Europe. As a freelance journalist, he has covered both the underground and mainstream aspects of the arts, culture, music, entertainment, travel, fashion and Fashion Week in several cities, including New York, London, Berlin, Istanbul, Sydney, Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Tokyo to name a few. He has been published in The Huffington Post, Trespass (London), Adaras Magazine (Miami) as well as featured in publications such as the New York Times, Vogue Italia, Turkish Huriyet and other on-line and print magazines in the U.S. and internationally. He recently released his memoir on life in Europe, 'Heaux Confessionals'. As a solo performer and with his band $kandal Du$t, he has toured in some of the world's most renowned clubs, simultaneously maintaining an underground renaissance, blurring the lines of all that is traditional and leaving his indelible, and ultimately unforgettable impression. There is no divide.

Brace yourself.


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