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Oh heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell no!

Before we even go one LETTER further, let’s be clear that we are Team Sharon on this one. And why?

This woman not only resurrected his career, but fucked and married him, carried his children, put up with his stuttering and drug abuse for decades and more, and this is how she is repaid?

Get all the checks, Sharon.

All of them.

But that’s the f*ckery of this situation in the first place. There wouldn’t be as many checks to even get if it weren’t for the fact that Sharon made all of that possible. She is the brains and mastermind behind all things Osbourne and if the rumors are true, there just might be a new Becky in our midsts.

Michelle Pugh

According to reports, Ozzy Osbourne has been sharing his shaky peen with celebrity hairdresser Michelle Pugh, who apparently will do all your hairs. Sharon, who insiders say has suspected for a while, waited until she had enough receipts in her hand before she confronted Ozzy and then kicked him out of their mansion. Now that the word is out on the streets that Michelle has been bangin’ her client list, she is MIA from her own hair salon Meche due to a “personal emergency”.

Mmmmhmmm.

Michelle Pugh

you need to borrow this, Sharon?!

Sharon may not have a beyhive of her own to call on, but surely they can be rented out for cases like this? After all, Michelle Pugh could have possibly done all of Jay-Z’s hairs too.

Find Becky and get her!

Triston

Triston is an American jetset performance artist, writer, event organizer, and activist based in Europe. As a freelance journalist, he has covered both the underground and mainstream aspects of the arts, culture, music, entertainment, travel, fashion and Fashion Week in several cities, including New York, London, Berlin, Istanbul, Sydney, Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Tokyo to name a few. He has been published in The Huffington Post, Trespass (London), Adaras Magazine (Miami) as well as featured in publications such as the New York Times, Vogue Italia, Turkish Huriyet and other on-line and print magazines in the U.S. and internationally. He recently released his memoir on life in Europe, ‘Heaux Confessionals’. As a solo performer and with his band $kandal Du$t, he has toured in some of the world’s most renowned clubs, simultaneously maintaining an underground renaissance, blurring the lines of all that is traditional and leaving his indelible, and ultimately unforgettable impression. There is no divide.


Brace yourself.


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