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Carlos Irwin Esteves may be 50 years old now, but Charlie Sheen is quite possibly still in his mid-teens. Because at the end of the day, his physical self has aged (some would claim prematurely) before our very eyes, but his mental state has regressed to near Benjamin Buttons levels.

And here we were, so confident in our theory that STDs were afraid of Charlie Sheen.

How wrong we were!

But let’s not get it twisted, because it’s not a game. To make a long, big dish on ass, fantastically f*ckerized story very short?

Charlie Sheen is a monster.

 

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don’t forget who put the ‘loco’ in locomotion first!

This is some tiger blood ignunce of epic proprtions!

Before anyone dare praise Sheen for announcing his status, be aware that it’s being squeezed out of him via several lawsuits. With reports surfacing that claim Sheen has known about his status for years, there’s no telling how many partners he has infected. He has already admitted to having unprotected sex with two people since being diagnosed four years ago, but for all we know Charlie Sheen doesn’t know how to count!

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Sheen, B.C. – before crack (booze, Heidi Fleiss, and a cornucopia of other sins)

Charlie Sheen has always been a posterboy for Hollywood, lending a pretty face and edgy persona to countless industry tales that involve him and some of its biggest names. While many of them led devious existences in their youth, they eventually settled into maturity both on screen and off, while it has always been Sheen refusing to grow up. On screen, he could pretend to embrace adult responsibility, but real life seemed to pose the ultimate dilemma for the actor. No matter how many times Sheen has captivated us with his charm, he has just as often reaped physical and verbal abuse on those closest to him. Characterized as a ticking bomb by some and a teddybear by others, it is quite evident that Sheen walks far too often on the wild side of the tight rope. With this latest misfire consuming the pop culture terrain, it will be interesting to see which side of that rope Sheen finds himself on once the smoke clears.

 

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Ahhhh, the fresh smell of old nepotism…

Hollywood birthed and bred this, and then released it upon the masses. With this latest revelation circling through the industry like a heat-seeking missile, the question now is if Mama La La Land will take care of one of its own bastard children and get him the help he so obviously needs. And when we say help, we don’t mean new production deals, movie releases, or television specials. We mean the psychiatric kind.

 

 

Stay tuned…

 

 

 

 

Triston
Triston is an American jetset performance artist, writer, event organizer, and activist based in Europe. As a freelance journalist, he has covered both the underground and mainstream aspects of the arts, culture, music, entertainment, travel, fashion and Fashion Week in several cities, including New York, London, Berlin, Istanbul, Sydney, Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Tokyo to name a few. He has been published in The Huffington Post, Trespass (London), Adaras Magazine (Miami) as well as featured in publications such as the New York Times, Vogue Italia, Turkish Huriyet and other on-line and print magazines in the U.S. and internationally. He recently released his memoir on life in Europe, 'Heaux Confessionals'. As a solo performer and with his band $kandal Du$t, he has toured in some of the world's most renowned clubs, simultaneously maintaining an underground renaissance, blurring the lines of all that is traditional and leaving his indelible, and ultimately unforgettable impression. There is no divide.

Brace yourself.


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