‘As The THOT Turns’, Episode #26 – When The Crevice Caves In

What do most women do when their uterus says HELL NO to any more occupants?

They close f*ckin’ shop, don’t they?

Well, not this tra-la-lop. Not this THOT.

When her nether-region says “Bye, Felicia”, alternative routes are planned.

Enter Kim Kardashian.

Enter Famewhore Central.

Enter the surrogate!

The woman who would die a quick death without the media following her every move has now announced that she and her equally famewhore-y partner, Kanye West, are not through expanding their KKlan. Especially now with the news that Beyonce and Jay-Z are now the proud parents of three children, these two are on a mission to pop have a third child as well.

If they think this is a game of catch-up, someone should warn Kuntye they have a looooooooooooong way to go.

Move over North and Saint West, because it looks like there’s about to be a brother or sister (or both) a-comin’ in 5,4,3,2…

According to reports, Kardashian is not gonna let a case of placenta accreta (we say ‘overworked hole’) discourage her from poppin’ out more children to potentially pimp. She has decided to go the Hollywood route and have someone else carry her babything. According to Kimmy…

“Not only has this been really painful, but now hearing that I can’t carry any more kids, it couldn’t get any worse. I mean, f–k, like I really tried everything and I really want this and it’s just not going to happen for me. After talking to Kanye, I think that I always knew that surrogacy was an option, but I didn’t think it was that realistic of an option. “Now, I feel like that’s my reality.”

Is it that Kim really cannot have any more kids the old fashioned way, or is it because she doesn’t want to risk more stretch marks on her Orca-like ass?

And does anyone care to guess what this other child could potentially be named?

God help us all.

Triston

XADES Multimedia

Triston is an American jetset performance artist, writer, event organizer, and activist based in Europe. As a freelance journalist, he has covered both the underground and mainstream aspects of the arts, culture, music, entertainment, travel, fashion and Fashion Week in several cities, including New York, London, Berlin, Istanbul, Sydney, Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Tokyo to name a few. He has been published in The Huffington Post, Trespass (London), Adaras Magazine (Miami) as well as featured in publications such as the New York Times, Vogue Italia, Washington Post, Turkish Huriyet and other on-line and print magazines in the U.S. and internationally. He recently released his memoir on life in Europe, 'Heaux Confessionals'. As a solo performer and with his band $kandal Du$t, he has toured in some of the world's most renowned clubs, simultaneously maintaining an underground renaissance, blurring the lines of all that is traditional and leaving his indelible, and ultimately unforgettable impression. There is no divide.

Brace yourself.


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