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And then sit her ass down?

Because every goddamn day that we arise from slumber, there is a new woman claiming to be the Becky that Beyoncé is referencing in her new visual album Lemonade. Who is the latest to step forward?

Enter the circle.

Enter Karrine Steffans.

Enter ‘Superhead’.

Now we all know she has been sucking on more than just lemons and is known to weave a tale or two, so we are not believing most of this story, but just for the sake of argument, let’s give this famewhore a bit of the headlines she so desperately desires. Steffans just ran to XOJane to pen this confession:

“I was a 21-year-old California transplant who’d been tossed into my first music video after a fateful meeting with director Hype Williams. A single mother raising my son on my own, I jumped at the chance to make $2,500 a day to dance around and look pretty next to the artist — Jay Z. He was a long-time friend of my cousin, Chuck, and after a call from him, Jay knew to keep me close, making sure I got loads of camera time. This was the beginning of my stint as a video girl, and one day Jay and I stole away for some time alone toward the end of the day.”

Reading between those lines and then snorting them, we conclude that she sucked her way to the main man to reach Jay-Z, but Steffans delves even further with her story, saying…

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“As I watched Lemonade, I heard a wife, a Beyoncé, cry about a Becky. I listened to her wail on songs like ‘I Pray You Catch Me‘ and ‘Sandcastles,’ and I resonated with how she felt as a woman who was promised forever and faithfulness only to have these notions dashed by another woman. There is a stigma attached to the other woman, the side piece. There is this notion that her position alone warrants shame but, honestly, I don’t see the difference. There is a silent shame that comes with being a Beyonce, being a wife who knows she’s been cheated on and lied to, but for the sake of matrimony. I am Becky with the good hair. I am Beyonce. I am the keeper of secrets, the betrayer of women, the confessor of my sins, the owner of my secrets, lies and salvations. Because we are all Becky with the good hair. Every last one of us.”

Speak for yourself, THOT.

Is Karrine the Latrine lie telling or is she the truth?

Will the real Becky stand up, once and for all?!

Triston
Triston is an American jetset performance artist, writer, event organizer, and activist based in Europe. As a freelance journalist, he has covered both the underground and mainstream aspects of the arts, culture, music, entertainment, travel, fashion and Fashion Week in several cities, including New York, London, Berlin, Istanbul, Sydney, Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Tokyo to name a few. He has been published in The Huffington Post, Trespass (London), Adaras Magazine (Miami) as well as featured in publications such as the New York Times, Vogue Italia, Turkish Huriyet and other on-line and print magazines in the U.S. and internationally. He recently released his memoir on life in Europe, 'Heaux Confessionals'. As a solo performer and with his band $kandal Du$t, he has toured in some of the world's most renowned clubs, simultaneously maintaining an underground renaissance, blurring the lines of all that is traditional and leaving his indelible, and ultimately unforgettable impression. There is no divide.

Brace yourself.


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